Today was not a good day. I as you can see, I suffered my fate with dignity, but having a bath is quite possibly my least favorite of all the negative experiences I have to endure in my daily life. You might think that, judging from the color of the water, I actually needed a bath, but that is pure nonsense. I prefer my fur to be slick with natural oils, because when it is, I itch less. And what dog would choose the scent of oatmeal shampoo over his own potent aroma? I am a good dog, though, so I put up with this torture thinly disguised as a bath. I remind myself that it could be much worse. They could be doing it with a hose...but I refuse to pretend like I enjoy it!! Even in the most desperate of situations, I will not be a ham for the camera. I prefer to remain stoic when I am being humiliated and abused.

Unfortunately, this day reeked of potential for disaster from the moment I got up. I started my day off by eating some kitty litter, which is one of my favorite forbidden treats. But something went terribly wrong and instead of digesting the morsel, I regurgitated it onto the dining room floor. My parents were both disgusted and intrigued. Someone wanted to take a picture of it for the blog, but I assure you all I would never let something as tasteless as a regurgitated morsel of kitty litter be displayed within this fine publication.

Anyway, it was all downhill from there. And to top it all off, its COLD outside. But at least I don't look like this when I go for walks:

My mom regularly gets mistaken for a homeless derelict, because she takes me for walks in the dark dressed in outfits similar to this one. Last week some of our neighbors pulled into their driveway when we were walking by and did not get out of their car until after we had gone on down the street and safely back into our house. What an embarassment to be tagged as the crazy homeless looking lady's pet! It's totally ruining my reputation.

On an upnote, I showed the Rotweiller down the street, who was boss yesterday. If he hadn't been behind that huge steel fence, I would have really socked it to him.